LOVELY FAILED EXPECTATIONS

Yes, you read it right. These are failed expectations but turns lovely overtime. So let me tell you how does it happened.

Woman are hopeless romantics, we dream a lot of sweet things that our man can do. We long for surprises, sweet social media posts, flowers and chocolates and a lot of fancy things. When we are being bragged, we felt so secure, definitely have "long hair"!

But, does these really matter? Does these measures good intentions?

Before, for me it does. Practically speaking, if a man does these things to a woman, he definitely wanted to make his woman happy. But lately I have learned, not all men think that way.

Joseph and I have been together for couple of months now and learned a lot of things from him, and how does some men like him really thinks. These ideas might upset some women, but I call these extraordinary =) So let me enumerate some failed expectations that turns out lovely.

He never play surprises, perhaps it's because he doesn't want to take chances and unsure of what really matters to me. But what he does, he asks what I really wanted and make sure I can definitely have it with extra other stuffs alike.

He never posts anything sweet in social media. It's not because he's not expressive but definitely because he's not a fan of social media. He can even survive without it and the last time he logged in is when he updated his relationship status with mine and stay online for only a minute! Instead of spilling sweet thoughts from the social media and tell everybody how he feels towards me online, he rather prefer to introduce me to his friends and close relatives personally. Spend time with me and my friends rather than exchanging comments and reactions with them online. And I think this is much sweeter than anything else😊

He never send me flowers and chocolates. As expected, this should never be missed during the courting stage, but with him, though he's aware of it, I guess he never had plans of doing this! I don't exactly know the reason behind this, but perhaps he was thinking I'd rather choose food on my table over flowers which will wither too soon and chocolates which will make me sick. And if I were to choose, I'd choose fruiquet for a healthier option! I believe in the old saying that "the easiest way to a mans heart is through his stomach", and I'm also thinking that he's a great believer on that. He never sends chocolates but he generously filled me with number of sweet delicacies from the places he'd been, send me bucket of fruits, food on a lunch box that it even took me weeks to eat it all. But take note, he doesn't like the idea that I'll gain weight. Very ironic isn't it?

He never take me to movies. It's too fancy imagining him with me and my friends to go into a movie and have dinner together, but it's not our thing. It's not a problem with him going out but we prefer outdoor activities together. We met in the mountain and we will get to know more of each other in mountains too =) He climbs with me and runs with me. I remember the first time he joins me to run, I challenged him to a 10K run then Iater I've learned that it was his first time! He got his muscles swollen the day after. I felt sorry for him and felt guilt within, but I feel special at the same time, thinking that he could make such sacrifices just support where I'm happy at. He promised that from that moment on, he'll join in every outdoor activities I have. Surpricingly, he remains consistent and true to his words. Yes, he never take me to movies but this is absolutely more of a lifetime adventure!

He doesn't hold my hand in public, but he sincerely asks my parents approval and gain pogi points from my friends. Love is something more of showing physical affection, it is also measured on how a man stands for you and no matter how shy he is, he got the courage to prove his good intentions.

I therefore conclude, an ideal relationship doesn't likely to happen what you have hoped for, it is more of how you embraced what is being genuinely given and stop daydreaming. Yes, I prayed that someone will come along, but never in my life I imagined that this will happen to me and I got to know him. An answered prayer indeed! Things happening are not exactly what I had hoped for, but I feel so blessed because God gave me someone more than I deserve and more than I had prayed for😊

When Clouds Disappear

About two years ago, I had wrapped my mind with such negative feelings towards others. Not only to a single person but few people who have been my best company before. I laugh at them, cheer with them, play with them, had long talks with them and even treat their home like mine. But a sudden change had gone by that separates us, we have conflicts, we fought and even to the extent that we have hurt each other’s feeling in the most unbelievable ways. We had resentments for a very long period of time and it seems that the other party was not willing to do so.

In my side, that particular person also told me that it was a gift from me that it was easy for me to forgive those who had hurt me… But in our case, I’ve gone through a long fight for my feelings towards them. The scar they made was too deep to diminish; I have lost something valuable because of them and that cannot take back since the damage is irrevocable. If somehow I will be given a chance to revenge I will do so whole heartedly.

After some time, the chance I’ve been waiting for has finally come. The door has opened for me to revenge and do the same thing for them. Not by telling some lies or speculations like what they did but to tell the truth and every fact that I know. Suddenly, I just can’t! Though I hate them so much, it’s not that simple. I know that they deserve it somehow, but I can’t even move just one nerve against them, and I just can’t help but feel vulnerable.

I prayed a lot to help me forget about it. I had forgiven them but I just can’t forget it, and that made me feel I’m not 100% sincere with my feelings towards them.  And though I prayed for it somehow, my heart and mind was not willing to cooperate.

All those times I’ve been thinking about these facts:

• Romans 12:17-21

Return evil for evil to no one. Provide fine things in the sight of all men. If possible, as far as it depends upon YOU, be peaceable with all men. Do not avenge yourselves, beloved, but yield place to the wrath; for it is written: “Vengeance is mine; I will repay, says Jehovah.” But, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by doing this you will heap fiery coals upon his head.” Do not let yourself be conquered by the evil, but keep conquering the evil with the good.

• Matthew 5:23-24

“If, then, you are bringing your gift to the altar and you there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar, and go away; first make your peace with your brother, and then, when you have come back, offer up your gift.

• Matthew 5:43-44

“YOU heard that it was said, ‘You must love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ However, I say to YOU: Continue to love YOUR enemies and to pray for those persecuting YOU;

The bible was right, but the truth is that, it’s easy to say but hard to make it happen. Whenever I pray for it, I always give myself some reasons that making peace with them depends on how they act. I make such excuses like “I had forgiven them long time ago but I’m just waiting for them to come over to me and approach me… and that’s all I need since they are the one who started it and I am the victim.”

Every time I test myself in that reasoning, it always ends up ignoring what I had learned.

Lately, one thing happen that changed it all. And it’s my chance to test myself again, and make peace not based on what they are going to act but based on how I am going to act. My “so-called-friends-and-foes” had faced a big trouble or let me just say a tragedy. Knowing the fact that one of them suddenly passed away, I am expecting that I will not regret that instead it made me feel sorry about it. Though we don’t have time to talk again about that issue, I know they needed comfort. Though they don’t need me at all, I still want to pay for a visit, sincerely.

Romans 12:17 was right “…If possible, as far as it depends upon YOU, be peaceable with all men.” And Matthew 5:44 “…pray for those persecuting YOU”. I know it would be a little hard for me to do so, but before I go to the funeral, I prayed and ask Jehovah to help me not to feel the same way I feel for them two years ago and help me to forget everything. And now that I’m open to it, my prayer was answered. The moment I talked to them, I felt a big burden just come out inside me and now I’m free to breath.

When I went home, I will never regret that visit. A visit that made me realize how it feels like to fully forgive someone who had hurt you so badly. Though there could be some remaining clouds above my head, thinking what they might feel about my sincerity- if they may take it positively or negatively – but I blew it all away. What they think towards me, it’s none of my liabilities anymore.

And as I had finished watching a “I Hear Your Voice”, the lesson is clear.

“If you revenge on the same thing that they did to you, does it make you different from them? Absolutely in other way around, you’ll become just like them in the end” and “Don’t waste your time hating someone, for you’ll be wasting your whole life that you must live happily”

In the end of it all, when the cloud all disappears in my head, it’s all worth living for.

 

September 2, 2013

5:14pm

Wind Up Knight's Great Little Thoughts

I downloaded this "Wind-Up Knight" application on my mobile phone about a year ago, and some of the tips it taught me still stocked in my mind that helped me positively and I also wanna share it with you and may remind you as well :)

So let’s start this up with:

And that’s right! I wonder why women have to wear excessive make-up? I remember what my officemate told me “who in the world had invented make-up?”, because as far as we are both concerned, we hate the fact that the Store Manager’s had implemented “No make-up, No Entry” policy since we never wanted wearing make-up at all. And we are in the state of calamity! Hahaha.. I know, make-up makes one’s working environment more formal and presentable, but would it make it more formal and presentable if it’s excessive? I don’t think so… So every day of our lives at work we have to make battles like a skirmish with guards on duty about our make-up letting them to notice that we have make-up on and they just don’t notice :D

And yes, natural beauty is such a pride!

This is one of the rules I had never mastered! I always love to talk, and when it comes to argument, I always wanted to talk first to insist I've got the right point… But I always end up losing and opens a new door for argument. Whew! And this made me realize, you've got a point here dear, but I just couldn't take it and made me feel vulnerable. I guess at this point, I also have to lower down my pride. Guy’s who let their woman talk first are considered gentlemen, but when a woman let her man talks first, she made him feel important to her. Weather my point is right or wrong, I really have to give way. So, which one are you going to choose?

Writing journals got most of my time during high school and college years. Whenever I felt lonesome, writing my thoughts in my Journal had been my outlet to outburst my hidden emotions.  But as time passed by, I decided to resign from it. Reading all over again made me feel sad about my troubles from the past and brings out the emptiness I felt way back then, a negative nostalgia runs into my veins and it doesn't made me feel better at all. So I decided to quit even writing the happiest moments of my life, thinking that it will made me feel sorry if those moments I have and shared with the people who are dear to me and they leave suddenly. But this tip made me realized something important from keeping a journal, and in a positive way. If I just keep on writing good things in it, thus, when I try to look back and scribble the pages all over again, it will made me feel blessed and how my life had been wonderfully made. What a good thought it could be!

Today, you are left by traditions if you won’t wear miniskirts or seductive dress. But as the bible say’s in 1 Timothy 2:9, 10

“Likewise I desire the women to adorn themselves in well‐arranged dress, with modesty and soundness of mind, not with styles of hair braiding and gold or pearls or very expensive garb, but in the way that befits women professing to reverence God, namely, through good works.”

Very practical wisdom! Little did some woman realized, they had been verbally abused because of their poor way of implementing dress standard for themselves. Some thinks that wearing attractive dress makes them feel attractive and sexy but it always end up being attractive to possible negative comments and responses. So girls, I you want to be respected, dress-up respectfully:)

Do I still have to explain it further? Ephesians 6:1-3 has it all..

“”Children, be obedient to ​YOUR​ parents in union with [the] Lord, for this is righteous:  “Honor your father and [your] mother”; which is the first command with a promise: “That it may go well with you and you may endure a long time on the earth””

Who wants a lousy partner anyway? Can you imagine yourself screaming for help and your “so-called-Light-in-Shining-Armored-Prince” has got nowhere to find and had run away right before you? Of course the strength we are considering doesn’t only come with the physical strength but also strong in handling relationship and strong spiritually. He had the ability to control over women’s outrageous behavior, and driving through the right path of relationship.

These are the little thoughts I found interesting in that application, and can accomplish great things when it should be applied... but of course though these can gave ample of advises  still the best one where we can get reliable facts, tips and rules always comes from the word of God, the Bible… Take time to read it sometimes, your eyes won’t hurt, promise:)

June 25, 2013

3:20pm

A Living Toy

I often hear about the saying “Dogs are Mens Best Friend” but a facebook page changes the idea in it, “Dog’s are Family”

I’m not writing this stuff not just because I love dogs, but because I saw something special in them that humans can imitate.

Before, I was so scared being alone at home without my brothers in the background, I bought a puppy with my boyfriend, and we named him Tootie – because  he has noticeably sharp tooth and he make use of it to the fullest! Biting bones, shoes, slippers, books, cd’s, mobile phone chargers, hangers...  and everything he feel like biting, never mind about the cost due to his biting vices… He messed up most of the time at home and my brothers feel like he’s burdensome attitude stress them to the highest level :D

There come a time when I just wanna take him out of the apartment and exile him to Tarlac. But no matter how we scold him or beat him (for a lesson due to his misbehavior), he’s “paawa effect style” ruins everything, and you can’t help it but forgive him… No matter how hard you are, and even you don’t give him food as punishment, he did his job from guarding your home, cuddles you unexpectedly, put his head and lean unto you, and do all he can just to please you… Whenever I’m stressed out from my daily routine at work, he absorbs it like a sponge instantly! When I feel down, he comforts me without a word (coz he can’t talk anyway.. he only know how to bark, hahaha) and he always know how to behave when it is needed.

It’s so amazing how a living creature like them can touch lives in an indefinite manner. Jehovah really made them for a purpose.

For his invisible [qualities] are clearly seen from the world’s creation onward, because they are perceived by the things made, even his eternal power and Godship, so that they are inexcusable. -Romans 1:20

June 25, 2013
1:39pm

Decision Maker

Yes? No? Maybe? Never? It sounds confusing though what decisions you have to make everyday. And it happens to me all the time... I felt like I'm offshore without knowing what to do and no directions that I have to follow... And I really need someone to tell me what to do.. but no, I think it's something.. not someone...

I had faced some difficulties with my parents these past few weeks, and it was really hard for me to deal with. My dad was leaving for work away from home for couple of months. He send message on my mobile phone telling me that he was in the airport already. My mom and brother was asking if I can make it to the airport to see my dad before he leaves. My mind was confused weather to go or not to go. If i'll go, I'm sunk with my pride and pretend as if we never had an argument before. But if I won't go, what will he's going to think about me? Rebellious? A child who doesn't even care about anything? What should I do? Ottoke? nado molla! :(

So in order for me to make decision abruptly... I searched for a top rated Decision Maker  Application in Google Play for my Android Phone to help me out to make decision in an instant. And gotcha! I run the application and start using it.. The first answer to my question is "No" so it means the decision maker tells me "not to go", then I roll the wheel all over again trying to convince myself about the answer. For the second time around the arrow goes for "No", but then again I give myself another try, and it goes for "yes"...

While letting the wheel turn for the decision my mom keep on texting asking if I should go. Thinking about the Decision Maker's decision, and the present circumstances I had, I finally made up my mind.

I stepped out of the office, and take that 5-minute-ride to the airport.
While on my way to the airport, I just then realized, that in making decision or decisions, it doesn't matter what will others will tell you to do or even what do that Decision Maker Application tells you, what your heart was telling you does really matters. Because even if your confused, you have to make a decision on your own in the end, and see for yourself that you will never regret the decision you made.

03.15.2013
9:52am

"Fight, Fight, Fight!"

Have you ever felt once in your life that you feel like you are lacking something?!

You did your best but it wasn’t good enough?!

You devoted your whole time but you feel like everything turns different and you feel the weakness inside you?!

Well, you are not alone because we feel the same way too... Lots of things had been different now and still keep on changing.

Last Friday my fellow believers discussed about it. At first I think I’m the only one feel spiritually weak, but as we opened up we almost feel the same way!

So we talked things over on how to get back on tract and keep going. And as the first step, we decided to visit a paralyzed brother for 10 years and who’d been in service as a Special Pioneer for 20 years for him to be strengthened and for us to be strengthened too!

Saturday afternoon, we did the first step. We went to their condominium to visit him.

His wife’s (Sister De Castro) smiling face welcomes us, and as we entered to Brother De Castro’s room his face was lighted and was so glad to meet us. He was laying on his bed, but full of joy! He’s a happy person and I can see how active he was before with the way he talks and his gestures. His words are vivid and strengthening! He tells us some of his experiences he had encountered during those bountiful years in Palawan where he was assigned.

We asked him what are the worst cases he had encountered during his ministry, and to our surprise he told us “Those are the things I don’t want remember, because I only keep the good experiences in mind”, and yes, he’s right! He talks as if those things are happened only yesterday and freshly stored in his mind.

We also asked him if did he ever felt weakness on his ministry, he told us that those feeling are common to servants and that’s normal, but though his activities had been limited he still have the strong determination to keep his faith as strong as he could. He told us to “KEEP ON FIGHTING” (1 Timothy 6:11) because there is no witness who is weak, we all have to be strong, and that’s the reason why he keeps on going despite his condition.

He quoted most of the talks we had in Kingdom Hall and most Magazines had published and even videos of the organization where Christians are viewed as runners, yes, we are all runners to gain the price of an everlasting life. The only difference in this sport is that fellow Christians are not competitors but acquaintances, we don’t need to be fast to finish first… there’s no matter weather we win or we lose, the most important thing is that we stay strong, keep going and keep struggling until we reach the finish line because in the end we still get the same prize.

Our spirituality lighted up as we hear those words of encouragement from him, and we are so glad that we did this wonderful step to visit him. As we walked away from their home, our weak spirituality was strengthened, and admires his positive attitude. Learning the truth that no matter what happened we have to fight negative thoughts and awaken the positive attitude we have inside.

As a conclusion… Think positive, be strong.. “FIGHT! FIGHT!” because Jehovah is here all the time to strengthen us (1 Peter 5:10)

In Depth of Silence

Do you know that expressive people are the bravest people?!

But me?! I'm coward... and I admit it!

We can't read the minds of others, and that's so true. We can only interpret what others feel if they let it show - I know that's what my special friend always trying to tell me.

"Be sweet and expressive Deneb!"

...For you really wont be able to read my mind, unless you're a psycho =). And even psycho's don't get it perfectly!

Honestly not just one person who complains about it, my mom also did! She once told me that with all of her siblings, I'm the one who doesn't care the most! =( I begun evaluating myself, and maybe she was right, but it doesn't mean I'm numb, maybe its just beacause I care silently... Deep down inside, though I didn't express it, it brokes my heart to see someone who is sad, and facing some problems and sick. Though often times, when someone is sick at home, I'm not the one who will going to cook for them or feed then nor give medicines to them at the right time, I care silently in my own way. Like when my mom is sick, I seldomly visit her to her room, because honestly I don't want to see anyone who's sick. Instead of asking her if she's ok and what she needed, I simply take a peek on her room and say nothing, then decided to do the chores she should've accomplish for the day, and took over the tasks to lessen her worries. When I'm praying, I always include them in my prayes. At times, I cry for them silently. Everything that I feel was dripping in the sound of silence. No one knows it but me. And that concludes people that I dont care at all, but I'm not.

I'm a happy person and I always want to stick that way.. But emotionally, I don't know what's wrong with me, and why I'm afraid to show how I feel.

I'm afraid people might find out what I'm thinking...

I'm afraid people will know that I care...

I'm afraid people will know that I love them...

I'm afraid that they'll find out that there are times I could be emotional too and that I'm afraid of rejections!

Maybe...just maybe...I want to let them show that I'm strong all the time, and with that perpective I often been misinterpreted as NUMB.

Now that I know that somehow I've been so wrong of showing how much I care and how much I love the people around me, Im trying my best to somehow lessen the shield that I've been trying to protect for such long time, and remove the blocks that burried my emotions.

I'm fond of writing stuffs like essay, poems and other literary works, and now I realize why writing became my passion - it's the only way I know I can express my feelings.

I'm not trying to change of who really I am but, I'm trying to be a better person. Better person grows positively, not seeking only for its own interest but also for the benefit of others before its too late.

I wanna be brave from now on!

And how I wish time will come that I'll be ready to express everything vocally and and physically, and if that happens... I will no longer hide my feelings in "Depth of Silence"

11:46am

August 26, 2010

Love equals INSANITY

When I went home last night, I decided to walk and distribute bible tracts to those people I saw walking on the street… I’m happy with what I’m doing and staple a smile on my face while saying "Hi! Para po s inyo!".. As I walk through, a girl behind me reach out and ask to give her something to read.. I didn’t know her, nor saw her before.. Though walking thru a dim-Lighted street I can see her sad reflection and bloated eyes (perhaps she’s bin crying all day).. She walked with me and within those few moments,i've Learned something from her.


She openly share what she really feel... I was thinking: "Hindi naman kami close.. But she talked to me as if we know each other for couple of years"


She told me that she needs to read something to divert her attention to something else... And she's sure that the tracts I gave her would really help... She told me she’s sad and broke, so I gave her another tracts entitled "Kaaliwan para sa mga Nanlulumo" and tell her "this one is really meant for you, hope it will help u a Lot"..


Without the feeling of awkwardness, I asked her "Bakit ka malungkot?!" and she abruptly replied "iniwan kasi ako ng mahal ko"


Ayun naman pala! I seized d words and ask myself: Why does stupid love drives everyone crazy?! Why is it so?!


But that question was even answered by the following words she utter…


She told me once again “Minahal ko kasi siya ng buong-buo… wala ako itinira para sa sarili ko. Ipinakita naman niya kasi na mahal niya ako, at nagsakripisyo rin kasi siya para sa akin”


Getting so curious, I asked again “Kung mahal ka niya bakit ka niya iniwan?!”
She replied “Nag-away lang kami minsan at umalis na siya… Iniwan na niya ako. Kaya alam ko talaga na ang mga binigay mong babasahin makakatulong talaga sa akin para makalimot kahit konti para di ko na siya laging iniisip.”


I sighed… and words can’t come out of my mouth. I’m speechless after all.


And as final word I told her that If she’ll love someone she don’t have to pour everything for a guy… Save something for herself so she won’t be hurt that way and if the guy really loves her, well he’ll be back soon! I’m beginning to tell some advices which I don’t know if that really works and throwing up words as if I had experience on that. Duh?! But I hope those few words would help.


We parted ways after that, she’s heading to the place where she and her boyfriend used to meet, and the place where they usually settle things when something went rocky, with the hope inside that she’ll be able to see him there again and reconcile.


Heading home after that conversation I learned something:


1. God’s word really heal wounded hearts (Psalms 34:18, Hebrew 4:12)
2. If you love someone, don’t give everything you have… save something for yourself so you can have the strength to move on once he left you.
3. People change and feelings too!
4. Don’t trust what only your heart feels.
5. Sacrifice is not enough to prove your love… but consistency does.
6. When you lost someone you keep on hoping he’ll be back again, but you have to move on
7. Crying is just a simple way of expressing sorrow but you don’t have to dig deep down into it
8. If you want to move on, forget everything
9. Untrue love makes people crazy and stupid
10. Experience love, experience insanity
11. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 explains what love really is
12. Love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:8)






Any violent reaction?!








April 15:2010
12:04 PM

On My Own

My hands are urging me to write, but I can’t think of anything.
I want to write my thoughts but I can’t think of anything good.
I just don’t understand.
I read a book instead but still my mind can’t absorb it.
I read every line over and over but the message can’t sink in.
I try to sleep after being exhausted from thinking of nothing, but my eyes are widely open
I’m so damn awake but failed to be enthusiastic.
I got a cup of coffee and brought it with me at the park and choose to be chilled with the morning fog
It’s good and cold outside, but I can’t appreciate it.
I sat still… until the sun shines over my face.
The bright light glares on me but it doesn’t work!
I feel so dumb and lifeless.
I walked with my eyes closed and all I hear was my heart beats…
Can’t see anything but brightness…
And the last thing I know… I’m falling…

Song that Inspires

Being a teacher is a difficult job, especially if nobody was listening :(
Someone has to take out all of its remaining energy though throat had been so dry and exhausted, hoping that someone will take an effort to cling its lazy eardrum to absorb some facts being taught several times...

If you were in that situation... will you posibbly give up?! raise the red flag and ready to surrender?! Let those people suffer for the consequences for not listening?!

well, take this inpirational song that will help you accomplish what Matthew 24:14 required us to do...



Sing Praises to Jehovah
Song Number 070

"Make Sure of the More Important Things"
(Philippians 1:10)

I
How great our need today for discernment,
To know the things that are true,
To know which things have greater importance,
To know which things we must do!
Love what is good; Hate what is bad.
Make God’s heart glad;
Find all the joy that it brings. Always pray;
Study each day.
Yes, may we do these important things.

II
And what could be of greater importance
Than sharing Kingdom good news,
To find our Father’s lost little sheep,
And to help them his way to choose?
They need to hear; They need to know.
Oh, may we show
Love for our neighbors and help them to see,
Help them get free!
Preaching is such an important thing.

III
If we take care to do what’s important,
Our faith will make us secure.
We’ll know the peace beyond human thinking
And keep our hope ever sure.
True friends we’ll find; True love we’ll know.
This love will grow.
Oh, what rich blessings it brings when we learn,
When we discern,
And when we do the important things!

...dream...

Today, I decided something that I know it will change my whole life. I set aside those things that bugging me. Once I made that choice I will go for it! I wont allow anything, even negative opinions - I won't entertain.

My "dream" is just waiting in front of me like a plant, waiting to be cultivated. And once I'll give it a try and make the best out of it, I know in its own beautiful time, it will provide a wonderful flower even surrounded by negativity.

A lotus flower is known to be one of the most pleasant flower on earth. It lives on dirty swamps or even in polluted bodies of water, but still, it continuously bear flowers. Like a lotus I will try everything to make my dream come true not just a mare dream... but something to make it happen! And just in case I failed to accomplish my oath/vow or maintain it - I will accept it with all my heart and without a doubt, that at least once in my life I try to dare myself into a most fulfilling task and give my 100%, despite the opinions, despite the time...

Now, I'm comming!

October 15, 2009
10:52pm

My Man… My Hero…

I can’t remember the day when he first held my hand but I remember the feeling behind it. I can’t remember the time when he leads me into the right way but I cherish the benefit of it my whole life. I can’t remember how many times he had to suffer just for me but I can still feel the love he was giving. I can’t remember how many times he strengthen my soul but still I remember what good example he showed that made me of who I am. I can’t remember how many times he fed me patiently but I want to do the same thing beginning today until I have him. Since the beginning of my story he had loved me unconditionally and I will love him more than forever can offer.

If only Gennies are true. I’m going to search the whole edge of the earth just to find that lamp or bottle where they lives and take that lifetime opportunity to make a wish to extend the life on the one I love. And if I could have wish at this very moment, that is to keep my hero’s life.

Am I being selfish?! Having him around is the most precious gift we could ever cherish. His smile brings joy to a stressed mind. His laughter means a thousand chocolates which melts the heart.

My Heroine had passed 14 years ago. Yes, it was awful and I can still feel how much it hurts me when I think about it. Undeniably, I miss her so much! But my Heroine is just sleeping silently waiting for that day to come and she’ll rise up again (1 John 5:28, 29). But if another hero raises his hand and surrender to the last enemy, that’s unbearable!

A month ago, my hero was diagnosed with Prostate Cancer after having operated due to Acute Appendicitis. I poured so much prayer for him, and oh… my friends and relatives poured so much prayers too! And I’m glad he’s still alive and kicking.

Maybe I should have to start counting the days… But I won’t. That hurts so much… Counting the days left feels like stabbing my figurative heart everyday and I’ll die first just before he’ll say goodbye.

For the mean time, while he’s still here… All I wanna do is to hug him tight and made him feel that he was loved.

My Man, May Hero, My Grandpa Isko don’t have wings but like a super Hero he rescues me whenever I need him. He favors everyone equally, he give fairly, and love unconditionally without asking anything in return – that’s pure love that I wanna imitate.

Simple things he did when I was little like carrying me on his back to cross the river for me not to soak up in water, leaning against me when mom beats me, secretly giving me money when mom and dad aren’t looking, assists me while joining him to ride on his dear Cow’s back, teaching me how to harvest peanuts and corns, manage to give a massage when my head aches, cook food for me, wash my little dirty hands and feet, utter a prayer with him before we eat and we go to sleep, stay beside me when I’m afraid, sit and take time to tell stories how good is Jehovah God and above all strengthening my spirituality when I’m about to give up, means so much to me and I treasure those moments like precious stones.

Suffering from Prostate cancer is not that easy. He changed a lot, physically, but I admire how he handles things. Out of those painful moments, he still manages to smile and listen to our boring stories. If we can only divide the aches he had, he never had to feel the pain at all, but prayer is all we can do, hoping that God will keep him alive a little longer.

But if that fortuitous event will happen, I’ll just close my eyes, smile and dreamt of a paradise with my two heroes positively.

September 29, 2009
4:32pm

LITTLE PIECE OF PARADISE

Friendship doesn’t occur overnight nor can’t it be measured how many times you have fun together. Real friendship comes out when they are there to give a helping hand in difficult times. (Proverbs 17:17)

In this wicked world where peace is so abundant, you will find such happiness with true friends ready to share every detail of their lives. Age, status, and differences are not counted but poured with deep respect and unconditional love. As other proverbs said, you cannot live without them…

When I started serving Jehovah a lot of my so-called-friends started pull away from me and even the whole class at school turned against me. My life is so miserable that time the fact that I had established my mind with my friends but then again, I’m alone after all. But there were few people who never turn their backs on me. I found my home in them and I’m so glad I found them!

During my teenage years I treat Kingdom Hall as my new home, where I feel like I’m a part of a Big Family, and until now… I’ve never been wrong! Things changes and there were some who come and go but that doesn’t break the ties we had, Trust and Faith has been our greatest foundation!

Now that I graduated in college, I treat Kingdom Hall as my New School! Moving from other Congregation make me feel like I’m a transferee, who needs adjustments and new set of friends. But I am amazed with the friendship I had with those people over there with different personalities. My life had been complete and I never felt that I’m alone - I’m not with my biological family this time but everyone made me feel that I belong to a BIG-HAPPY-FAMILY! I had numerous Grandmas, Grandpas, Mommies, Daddies, Brothers and Sisters in the congregation… And words are not enough to thank them for the unconditional love they shown me and everything they taught me that I need to know.

They are so protective yet so comforting! I can’t remember nor can’t count the times I have to hold an uncontrolled laughter, chasing one another, strengthening faith, sharing knowledge, walking in the ministry together, numerous tears that they had wiped out, simple taps on my back and above all doing pure and plain nonsense things but still all these means everything!

They are there willing to give a helping hand with a joyful heart, without thinking twice, and without asking something in return.

I can’t imagine how my life would be without them - taking them away from me means taking away that precious “little piece of paradise” I had in me.

September 24, 2009
2:48pm

MAKING TIME FOR EVERYTHING

Managing time is such a very tough job for me... In mathematics, identifying time would be so easy like ABC's but in real life?! It never was for me. If I were to ask what would be the first wish among my list excluding everything about myself and my family, it would be to extend the day twice! It sounds funny, right?! Come to think of it- a day composed of 24 hour straight, regardless of the fact if you want to slow down everything to rush everything, time is constant! It was never been extended.. with that, the whole world is rushing! Try this simple mathematics:

An average person can sleep for 8hrs a day, so the remaining hrs he had to spent for his whole day activity would be 16hrs.. In the morning when he wakes up he had to spent at least 2hrs to fix himself to go to work, cook and eat food and he's ready! So, 16hrs less 2 hrs. is 14hrs. The next 1 hour, he had to spent it traveling to his workplace. Then 9 hours working in the office inclusive of his "1-hour-Lunch Break". Then go back home again and travel for an hour.. So, before going to sleep again, what shall he do for the remaining 3hrs including time to eat for his dinner?! Watch TV, sit back and relax, talk to his family, play video games, read publications?! Hectic huh?!

What can you say if he's working for 6 days a week?! well he still have one day for a day-off/rest-day.. but what if that rest day would turn out to be the time when he has to wash his clothes, take a grocery for the whole week, and clean his home... whew?! tiring!? do you think he could still take time for anything else?!

Now the question is this...

WHY ARE WE MAKING COMPUTATIONS ON THIS MAN'S HECTIC SCHEDULE? SHOULD I CARE ABOUT IT?!

Yes, you have to care about it.. This is everyone’s lifestyle today. Sleep-work-Sleep... Everyday is a routine, but don’t let your life will rule that routine. Working is so productive and it'll help you survive financially but it doesn't mean you have to focus on it. How about taking time to utter a little prayer every time you woke up, before you eat your meal, when you are down, when you are happy and right before you go to sleep? Would it be a BIG disturbance or delay on your so-busy-life schedule?!

Have you ever watched the Movie "Bruce Almighty"?! It would make you realize how busy God was but He take time to listen to everybody in the whole world. How and why He did it? Its because of love!

Being focus only on your own benefit would made you a selfish person, be generous and exercise the "nine fruitage of the spirit" (love, joy, peace, long suffering, kindness, goodness, faith, mildness and self control - Galatians 5:22).

Why don't you take a sit with a friend and have some coffees? Or take time to read the Bible? Or give a hand to someone in need? Being generous doesn't mean that you have to give material in all means, but there's something in your own simple ways you can contribute something that will change lives into a better one..

More than 7million people in this world do that whole heartedly... No one asks for it but they are willing to devote their lives and offer help in a different way that is more of a treasure. Those people who take time to talk to you no matter how hard you try to ignore them, took them for granted, and no matter how hard you try to hide or stay away from them, they still keep on seeking for your attention for your own benefit that you never even dare to recognize. They wanted to help you, and love urge them to do that.. A pure love that never asks anything in return but time. Why don't you try talk to them and listen for that "2 minutes" that they are asking for whenever they knock at your door?! You won't loose anything, yet you will gain something for free... and in fact you will cherish it for the rest of your life.. That 2-minute-talk will change everything.

With that 7 million people tirelessly knocking at your door, distributing bible tracts in the streets, parks, transport vehicles and in every corner of the world, have their own lives too! Like an average working man who has the same set of schedule, they make time for everything especially for that life saving virtue. When they woke up, they allot at least 5minutes to read daily bible text and utter prayer. Within that one hour travel to and from work, they make time to talk to anyone who listens beside them in the buses, trains, and terminals and spread the good news.. During 1 hour break they never loose any opportunity to share a little bit of "life-saving knowledge" to their workmates. When they went home, they spent the remaining 3 hours with their family inculcating in the minds of their little children how does the love for Jehovah will help them to love others too! And at some point they join the early evening witnessing to reach the people who are seldom to find during the day at home.

When taking their day-offs or rest day, instead of enjoying the time sleeping for long hours, they woke up early to do the household chores and immediately run to their perspective territories to join the house to house preaching and was very pleased to visit who shows interest in learning the Bible with their family or set of friends. The time of these individuals never waste anytime to help just to fulfill what Matthew 24:14 says that the good news will be spread to all those inhabited on earth and in 1 Timothy 4:16 (Pay constant attention to yourself and to your teaching. Stay by these things, for by doing this you will save both yourself and those who will listen to you). That is called unselfish love.

Despite these hectic and so-busy-life schedule these 7 million individuals doesn't mean that they never had time to enjoy and indulge themselves to be happy, in fact they are happy every time they serve Jehovah and the people even though they also had encountered numerous ups and downs and even persecuted... they never give up! They put faith and trust in Jehovah that He will never took them for granted (Isaiah 42:0) but can you can do the same thing!

"TIME IS GOLD!" that's what the world was thinking but with these 7 million people says: "TIME IS LIFE!"

We are full of life's frustration, several ups and downs, and everything goes but though in this depressed world where you can hear nothing but bad news, you can still find light in the darkness- and the good news is just right knocking upon your door waiting to be opened... So next time when a Jehovah's Witness knock at your door, dare to open... PROMISE "they don't bite nor hurt you neither!"

September 14, 2009
6:00pm

IM WITH THE CULPRIT

“TRUST” – that’s the common word I heard in most conversations everyday. I also define it as crystal clear withy my “complicated mind” before, but now… I don’t even know the essence of it anymore.

Trust + companion = great friendship

In order to gain good relationship to others, trust must be established. And to all companions I had “since birth” I use that friendship equation. But one incident changes everything. Someone not physical but stabbed my back in a sense that I never expect it to happen. I trust this person with all my heart – though with doubt… I trust her even I didn’t know her that much, and even though I didn’t know what she’s thinking about. I used to enjoy the companionship she opens up for everybody, and I am not able to absorb the odds that keep on bugging into my mind. But instinct is sometimes, or should I say it is often right… It’s too late to realize that I should have trusted my instinct instead of trusting her.

It’s the 19th of May when I already confirmed that I lost something valuable to me. That was the day that I can’t believe that the culprit is with us. I don’t know who she is but choices are very minimal, but it so hard to point out since I built that so called “trust” to all those people at the apartment. The time she stole my so called “precious” (like Gollum/smeagle of LOTR), she already stole my future – or better yet suspended my plans – the fact that I may not be able to go to school again at the moment because of that. I know I may be able to replace it sooner but the trust I established was broken and it can never be whole again.. One thing I may just ask “you culprit”?!

Aren’t you afraid that someday, all the bad things you’ve done will go back to you? Because here in Earth everything has its own cycle. You should have to watch out what could be yours…

I don’t wanna be hysterical or do something stupid like to yell, to ignore everyone in the house or to make “sermon’ upon you (whoever you are), its just a matter of conscience that will move the culprit to confess everything. I wanna be clam as much as I could though deep in my so called “complicated mind” and “stubborn heart”, I’m hurting – the fact that I haven’t done anything wrong to anybody in order for that culprit to take revenge on me… She did it once – I ignored… She did it twice - I ignored it all over again… but for the third time around, that wasn’t normal anymore… that’s a habit! She made it as a routine in her life to take someone else’s belonging and it’s not funny! If she’s playing a practical joke, well we are not pleased or should I say I feel worst than that.

In a circle of friends I deal with everyday under one roof I really don’t wanna speak out what sucks me inside, the reason why I just pour everything I had in my mind on my blog hoping that one of these days the culprit maybe able to read this that will move her to approach me, confess everything, and try to explain why she did that.. perhaps I may be able to understand and forgive her.

For the mean time or for as long as I’m with her, in order to minimize future attempts to work on for her HABIT, I had to lock everything that was unlocked before, even TRUST!

CONCLUSION

Since childhood I ask a simple question which is quite hard to answer... until now I haven't got the right explanation yet, why I exist in this world?

I am creation of love... though I know it’s quite hard to believe but that really is! At times I ask myself, why on earth I have to deal with tough life where I feel like no one loves me. I often dreamt of being angel with wings and hallo serving in the holy place, but I’m created as human and my life limits only here on earth... yes I know humans were created to inhabit earth.

I might cry a lot during my teenage years realizing that why nobody cares for me... no one is ever been proud of me. My mom favors my brother, and always took me for granted. And yet you might feel the same agony I have inside during those tough years, a time when I needed someone to lift me up yet my parents are not there. I need moral support buy where are they? Do they care? Hell! I'm hanging over here!

It's so awful to watch my life like a movie where no one understand and recognize me or the worst of all no one realized I exist! I went to contest at school with no enough money for me neither to buy some food nor to go to practice without asking "are you tired? How’s your competition? Did you won?" how I’m so thirst to hear those words but no one cares? Who knows I exist anyway? Hey I won some competitions but never did I hear the words "congratulations! Keep up the good work!" Hell I'm just doing good deeds for nothing. At school everybody recognized me as an outstanding student but my parents don't even know anything about it. My professor thinks that my parents had been so proud of me but they never know how it hurts me so much that they don't dare to ask my grades. During college, since parent’s signatures on cards are not required anymore to tell you exactly the truth my mom saw one of my grades only, but my dad never did. I'm working now but they still don't know what my grades are... I'm so poor!

Everyday of my life I'm still asking for the same old question, over and over again... Why, Why and why?

But I remember one scenario of my life that made me think of my existence... It was a way too long that we had once traveled with my mom, my little brother and with my uncle. I was sitting sleeping at the passenger seat, when suddenly I woke up without anyone noticed, and I heard my mom and my uncle talking. Topic seems so new to me... and because of curiosity; I accidentally heard something that I supposed not to hear... my uncle said pointing at me
"Look at her... I never thought she'll grow up like that; she seems so little when she's still a kid. And fortunately she lives!”

I was stunned of what I heard, and then my mom responded "Yeah, she's holding too much that even I took medicine to abort her, it doesn't work. Things happening that time is so bleak with your cousin, we often fight with a lot of things and we nearly separated that's why I decided to take her off."

"Good thing she hold tight. You see? She’s a gift!" my uncle replied.

"Yes you're right, that's what my brother also told me especially when he watches her growing. He even told me 'See? if you abort that kid, you missed half of your life. She looks like an angel descended from heaven. Without her you won't settle your relationship with your husband. You won't also have that angelic baby with you right now. A very bright kid that perhaps would also give you brighter future. Maybe that's the reason why God didn't take her off your womb' ".

I don't know what should I react the when I heard that conversation, 11 years had passed but those conversation is still fresh in my mind. I don't know if I'll be thankful that I'm here or not. But one thing I'm sure of... I'm here for a reason even though I have bugs in my brain that hunts me every now and then at least I have picked one part of the puzzle now, and continue to live to complete it.

The time I will lay down comfortably in my bed, close my eyes and take my one last breath perhaps that would be the time that I can complete the puzzle, a puzzle that will call "my life", and the reason of my existence would finally lead to its conclusion at last...

April 07, 2008
6:53pm

I WILL SURVIVE

Have you ever wished that you were dead? have you ever cursed your life just to finished all of your sufferings? in short, did you ever think of a suicidal course of action? Honestly you were not alone, sometimes I often think about it when I'm on a big trouble, when I faced with such difficult problems and anything that I don't want to face. And I'm glad I'm just thinking about it, because try to see some people out there... according to the statistics, in 1984(the year when I was born) 100,000 suicide cases were already listed worldwide, and in 2000 769.3% had increased its percentage where the WHO(World Health Organization) reported 76,930,000 cases, what more for the unreported one? So it only means that as time passes by, millions of people don’t enjoy life after all... That's the negative side of being human, we were very much aware about our existence, and suicidal is the shortcut of everything! I often asked myself, whey we really need to be here? Perhaps you also asked that to yourself! but you know what? Answers were not hard to find... it's always in the bible! And that made my life different...

Here are few situations that made me think about it...
This only happens a week ago. My dad hasn’t been critically ill actually, but he needs to be hospitalized due to his gallbladder stone, the doctors really need to remove it... not just the stone but the whole gallbladder itself. It just pretty amazing that a person can live normally even without it! So there's no room to be worried about in my dad's case. I never get used to hospitals, honestly but I know that people who were ill needs some emotional support by visiting them. As I walked into the ward room (where my dad is), the room is packed, I mean no empty beds, all have patients in it. Where every bed have its own story that I have learned from it. That's why I also want to share it to you.

On the first bed next to us, is a patient also who have the same case as my father, but as you dig deeper into it, my father is the healthiest above all the patients in the room (thank God!). Back to the topic, that patient in the first bed has lots of visitors and I guess those were his officemates, friends and relatives. He had his wife beside him. His recovery gone too fast and he only stayed in the hospital for few days. How did he recover that fast? Because he was holding on to someone and into something, he had his family as inspiration to keep going.

On the left bed beside us, they came from a far city about 10 hours away from the Hospitals location if you have to ride on a bus. They were cheerful and friendly couple as I had observed. The husband had been diagnosed for having tumor on the left side of his heart, of course you can see how worried they are, the fact that he will still be undertaking lots of tests and one operation after another. He's still okay on the first day, but as time passes by he begun weaker as the process proceeds. Doctors make some holes on his chest then another two hole on his side then if the tests were complete they'll going to open his chest! Imagine how hard it could be if you were in his situation. What will you do then if you were him? One thing more... because they came from far-off place there's a little chance of having their own visitors. We guess that no one really visits them... Except for my brother, who sometimes visits them when they had moved to other room. Chances are there's no room of comfort, no emotional support (personally), only through phone calls. That's really so tough! But I was amazed on how they handle their situation, which they can still manage to laugh behind those worried eyes (just set aside the Hospital bills first, that will only add some headaches)... I admire their optimistic spirit! Really! And if you were to ask me what will I do if I were in that situation? Perhaps I want to tell you "Just leave me alone! I want to die and I want to stop these sufferings!” Emotional isn't it? But they aren't like that... On the top of their minds it says "This too shall pass and I will be WELL again, I'll be able to spend some time with my children's again, and I'll be on my regular work routine for my family. I love them and I want to be with them always." I feel like a little psychotic on that part... hey you see? There’s really something behind those hazel eyes! I can read some...ha ha ha... But seriously speaking there is! And why do they keep on holding on? So that they can go back home again, and spend time with those they love specially with their children. Life seems so ironic if you got to see the point. Even though they don't know when will they go back home, they still manage to invite us and visit them on there home place! Those instances only provide you some of the strong hopes that the couple has beautiful tomorrow.

On the bed on the center bottom that faces the room door, the patient is not that old enough maybe at early 60's. He had that phenomenal Diabetes, which led him to cut-off his right leg. From that moment onwards he will going to spend his life physically incomplete, and really needs a lot of adjustment. Few days after his operation, his family with his grandchildren’s organized a party and ate with him while he's lying on bed. He's so weak and can hardly even talk, he just try to make some signs to communicate but most of the time he only whispers. They took pictures along with him and they'll hoping that he could recover and go back home again. His sister which is far older than him and his loving wife were the ones who patiently looking after him. With those kind of affection, he is motivated to keep going and by heart it says "I will survive!". If you were him? Can you survive?

On the other hand, the bed opposite on my dad's bed is somewhat difficult as well. He also suffered the same illness, Diabetes... He's the oldest of all the patients in the room, but the most notable feature in him is that he ALWAYS smiles. Sometimes he were in severe pain, whom doctors needs to put something on his anal just to remove the wastes that was stuck inside him that cannot be discharged, his digestive system aren't working properly already. Of course it isn't that easy! One thing more, he don't have his family with him, to look after him. His care giver is the one who's with him but she always do scold him (acting like she's a wife or a daughter, sometimes treat him with no respect), I didn't dare to asked why she's acting like that but according to the lady who is right beside them on the room, that old sick widow man had been bad during his HEALTHY days. But don't you see? This is the moment where he needs someone to take good care of him... Then lately the caregiver went home and leave the old man alone, promises to come back as soon as possible but until night she never returned. So sad isn't it? It's like singing the song "Just when I needed you most" dedicated for his family. The worst thing in it is that concerning the BILLS he had on the hospital. The old man is worrying too much, where will he going to get some money to pay the huge amount of bills he had. And as a last remedy, he'll going to sell all of his property (house and lot) instead in exchange for the hospital bill. Huh?! Where will he going anyway if that happens?! Worried right? But will all that burdens he still SMILES constantly! What will be the factor why is he still fighting? He is hoping that he can overcome all those obstacles, and knew there were still some room to change for the better HIM (physically and spiritually), hope is still there when mostly it seems to be no hope. After few days in hospital, finally one of his son arrived!

Imagine the situation with those few people I had mentioned in that particular room in the hospital? Can you still absorb it? Their situation seems so bleak, but they're not looking on to the dark side! It like they are looking for the tiny bright light that illuminates a small amount on a very dark room. Think about this... how many people you know who were in the hospital everyday fighting for their lives? How many people you know who struggled so hard to survive? How many people you know who want to steal a life just to make their love ones live longer? How many people you know who were willing to surrender all that they have just to live? If we were to compare their situation against ours, we can conclude that we were still far luckier than they are. If that so, therefore we have much reasons to fight, and not to be disappointed. IF OTHERS CAN, WHY CAN'T I? Right? With those 76,930,000people who commit suicide last 2000, they are so weak... they are not wise. How about you? Are you wise enough?

August 17, 2007
4:24pm

MOVIE STAR

Have you ever imagined when your watching television or sinema that you were there, the one who were acting for the film you've been dreaming of? Having the opportunity to be with the celebrity that you've been dying to be with? Guess you've been wondering how life may seem if you were the leading character of the story... Well to tell you honestly, people wasn't aware of everything about the real movie in the real world. After you have read this article perhaps you may realize that things you've been dreaming would be posible and that you were a real movie star!

Every one of us have our own movie and our story. It is a thing we called "Life" as we journey, it is a never ending adventure that you never wanna missed every single detail of it. As we go further, we learn a lot of things... about ourselves, about those people around us, and about our environment that affects our behavior as human. In our movie, we don't need camera men to shoot every detail of the things we do, people can watch us without any movie pass, live and true... there would be scripts also but though you can make you're own story. Sometimes we may choose what kind of blockbuster movie hit we have to do in every aspect of our life and daily living.

We may choose the romantic movie when someone comes along that we truely love, other ends with such happy ending like what do cinderella, snow white and other stories does, that ended with "happily ever after" quotation. Other ends with heartaches and pain, and others may also be a tragedy where Shakespeare is the best of it! On the other hand, it takes a little bit of drama, action, comedy and suspense. Whatever it is, we are the living character in the story of our own movie.

LEADING CHARACTER
As to the real movie industry, a chosen character is motivated and trained to get the mastery of his role, and to make a good performance on the actual screen. We as the main character, were trained by our dear parents from birth until we had reached thar right age to perform our duties and responsibilities not only as a child but as human being as well-- cultured, motivated, and inspired.

As making or taking our role, we try to be the best of it, but were aren't that perfect and made mistakes several times... a series of certain "cuts" and try to make another take until we've got the best shot. Mistakes which were considered cuts that help us mold things up and learning from them, making an effort to overcome all the difficulties, obstacles, and challenges. But as long as we live, there's always been a second chance or more to make the wrong things we've done right. Scripts were sometimes given to us as manual that will provide us good guidance and advices like the holy bible, inspirational, and other self-steem improving books, which would be the best material we can ever posses that will guide us on playing our role as good individual having the best character throughout the movie scene.

DIRECTORS AND PRODUCERS
Director is the one who manipulates the movie and make things out good and done it properly. Producer were the one who provide us what we need, financially and other factors. Our director and producer is the Almighty God, who helped us to direct the path we have to be travelling, He produces us things which cannot be provided by other, it might be materially and spiritually. He never Leaves us until the end of the movie, and continue motivating its casts to make and perform the good one.

Our parents, were the co-director and co-producer of God. They were the one who brings us into this world, in a world of movie industry, working together hand-in-hand with God. They had built up one of the factors that contribute to our overall personality. With them we can find sense of belongingness and can find the unconditional love we need. They continue assisting us, correct our errors or mistakes, forgive us from our faults and discipline us when needed. So to be good a performer, we are all obliged to listen to our directors and producers, who were patiently trains us to be a better star.

ASSISTANTS
Assistants were those people who were helping us to do things as they have to be. In a movie industry, they were the fashion designers, art and music directors, writers, coreographers, graphic artists, motion picture designers and others. They contribute something which is intangible. They do things which products of their efforts can be seen in the actual screen play, they give life and light, and make the performance complete and attractive by adding different concepts that can make the movie good and real as a whole.

LOVE INTEREST
Movie can never be as good without love. Even the most terrifying horror movies embodied with love. It is the part of the story where every viewer can relate! Perhaps you have watched a movie having the same or almost the same love story as yours. Yes it makes the movie meaningful and gives life to the story.

Once in a while you’ve met someone whom you think is the best for you. For once in a while you will find someone who will love you the same way that you do. Everyone does fall in love! Even villains do fall in love too! And falling in love is the greatest feeling we had and the most beautiful part in the movie we had. This romantic stage in our life will taught us many things, on what is the feeling of loving and being loved, the feeling of loosing and hurting, the feeling of falling and stumbling and also taught us how to rise beyond the pain, trials, and heartaches.

In this romantic phase, you will realize how do Cinderella found by his Prince charming, how Romeo falls for his Juliet, why Jack and Rose have to be apart and why does Samson and Delilah wasn’t for each other.

There are times we may say “Hi” to our first love then all of a sudden say “Goodbye” then lately will entertain another lover and so forth. Love is a continuous cycle; we never tired of loving and loosing someone until we had found our true love. There are times we may say he/she is the “one” then lately realized he/she isn’t. But don’t loose hope because there’s always someone out there waiting for you to come around. Remember, what ever heartache may bring into you, always learn to let go…you may not understand why things would have to be that way on the first place, and there’s so much to questions to asked without further answers, but as you go on, take time to heal the wound and you will then realized that everything happens for a reason and that you deserve better, so as you’ll find the answers of all your questions perfectly. As you may find the right one for you cherish and treasure the memories you have together do your best to make your relationship worth holding for. Yes, love really makes the world go round!

THE STORYBOARD
A storyboard is a series of drawings and sketches depicting various sequence of the film. It is a so-called blue print of a movie that saves time and putting a movie into a good direction.

Same as to the real-life, there’s a saying that “a man with no dream is a man without direction”. Storyboard is our “dreams”, a series of goals, visions, and objectives of an individual. It serves as a natural blueprint in every aspect of our daily lives; this shows what we want to have and to be in the future. In attaining our dream—either it might be a small, simple or big dream—we have to do something and endure everything to achieve what we want. Dreaming is free! You may dream as many as you wanted, and as high it may seem, but you don’t have sit on a corner and wait for that dream to come true, instead, set some goals and standards and work for it everyday, step by step and little by little.

Your dream is something that lies behind the valley of thorns, before you may reach it, you must be willing to sacrifice and work hard for it—you have to take the courage to fight for it and travel to endure and struggle all obstacles, pits and traps, pain and trials. In order to be a great survivor, you have to equip yourself tools or weapons that would help you to fight! You have the skills, talents, and strength, freewill, vision and ability that will serve as your tools and will put you into the direction directly to your success.

If you’ve got the fighting spirit, you can make it through. Being a winner is not the matter of not experiencing any downfall but on how you rise on every fall you encountered. Giving up is no good. Holding on though dreams seem so far will lead you to take a one step closer. You will just wake up someday realizing that you were holding the trophy of success.

Others may try to discourage and laugh at your dream, but don’t get disappointed instead take it as a challenge to prove them your worth, and you were here for a reason. If you succeeded and passed on a valley of thorns, you may reach then for your reward at hand, and now prizes are on your reach! When you were at the top, always thank God for all the blessings and guidance ant to those people who helped you and always remember…be humble and also find some ways to help your fellow to get the chance to reach for their own stars too, the same way as you do!

And to all these concerns, having the Directors and Producers, Assistants, Cast of Characters, Love interest, Storyboard and Leading character (which is you), continue to shine like star and be the model to all as far as you can. Prove your worth as a person and as a movie star. Continue to touch others’ lives and furnish them with lessons, ideas and good examples to find their way to their own great movie too! A very meaningful movie and a never-ending story you called… LIFE!


May 24, 2005
06:12 pm