“TRUST” – that’s the common word I heard in most conversations everyday. I also define it as crystal clear withy my “complicated mind” before, but now… I don’t even know the essence of it anymore.
Trust + companion = great friendship
In order to gain good relationship to others, trust must be established. And to all companions I had “since birth” I use that friendship equation. But one incident changes everything. Someone not physical but stabbed my back in a sense that I never expect it to happen. I trust this person with all my heart – though with doubt… I trust her even I didn’t know her that much, and even though I didn’t know what she’s thinking about. I used to enjoy the companionship she opens up for everybody, and I am not able to absorb the odds that keep on bugging into my mind. But instinct is sometimes, or should I say it is often right… It’s too late to realize that I should have trusted my instinct instead of trusting her.
It’s the 19th of May when I already confirmed that I lost something valuable to me. That was the day that I can’t believe that the culprit is with us. I don’t know who she is but choices are very minimal, but it so hard to point out since I built that so called “trust” to all those people at the apartment. The time she stole my so called “precious” (like Gollum/smeagle of LOTR), she already stole my future – or better yet suspended my plans – the fact that I may not be able to go to school again at the moment because of that. I know I may be able to replace it sooner but the trust I established was broken and it can never be whole again.. One thing I may just ask “you culprit”?!
Aren’t you afraid that someday, all the bad things you’ve done will go back to you? Because here in Earth everything has its own cycle. You should have to watch out what could be yours…
I don’t wanna be hysterical or do something stupid like to yell, to ignore everyone in the house or to make “sermon’ upon you (whoever you are), its just a matter of conscience that will move the culprit to confess everything. I wanna be clam as much as I could though deep in my so called “complicated mind” and “stubborn heart”, I’m hurting – the fact that I haven’t done anything wrong to anybody in order for that culprit to take revenge on me… She did it once – I ignored… She did it twice - I ignored it all over again… but for the third time around, that wasn’t normal anymore… that’s a habit! She made it as a routine in her life to take someone else’s belonging and it’s not funny! If she’s playing a practical joke, well we are not pleased or should I say I feel worst than that.
In a circle of friends I deal with everyday under one roof I really don’t wanna speak out what sucks me inside, the reason why I just pour everything I had in my mind on my blog hoping that one of these days the culprit maybe able to read this that will move her to approach me, confess everything, and try to explain why she did that.. perhaps I may be able to understand and forgive her.
For the mean time or for as long as I’m with her, in order to minimize future attempts to work on for her HABIT, I had to lock everything that was unlocked before, even TRUST!
Trust + companion = great friendship
In order to gain good relationship to others, trust must be established. And to all companions I had “since birth” I use that friendship equation. But one incident changes everything. Someone not physical but stabbed my back in a sense that I never expect it to happen. I trust this person with all my heart – though with doubt… I trust her even I didn’t know her that much, and even though I didn’t know what she’s thinking about. I used to enjoy the companionship she opens up for everybody, and I am not able to absorb the odds that keep on bugging into my mind. But instinct is sometimes, or should I say it is often right… It’s too late to realize that I should have trusted my instinct instead of trusting her.
It’s the 19th of May when I already confirmed that I lost something valuable to me. That was the day that I can’t believe that the culprit is with us. I don’t know who she is but choices are very minimal, but it so hard to point out since I built that so called “trust” to all those people at the apartment. The time she stole my so called “precious” (like Gollum/smeagle of LOTR), she already stole my future – or better yet suspended my plans – the fact that I may not be able to go to school again at the moment because of that. I know I may be able to replace it sooner but the trust I established was broken and it can never be whole again.. One thing I may just ask “you culprit”?!
Aren’t you afraid that someday, all the bad things you’ve done will go back to you? Because here in Earth everything has its own cycle. You should have to watch out what could be yours…
I don’t wanna be hysterical or do something stupid like to yell, to ignore everyone in the house or to make “sermon’ upon you (whoever you are), its just a matter of conscience that will move the culprit to confess everything. I wanna be clam as much as I could though deep in my so called “complicated mind” and “stubborn heart”, I’m hurting – the fact that I haven’t done anything wrong to anybody in order for that culprit to take revenge on me… She did it once – I ignored… She did it twice - I ignored it all over again… but for the third time around, that wasn’t normal anymore… that’s a habit! She made it as a routine in her life to take someone else’s belonging and it’s not funny! If she’s playing a practical joke, well we are not pleased or should I say I feel worst than that.
In a circle of friends I deal with everyday under one roof I really don’t wanna speak out what sucks me inside, the reason why I just pour everything I had in my mind on my blog hoping that one of these days the culprit maybe able to read this that will move her to approach me, confess everything, and try to explain why she did that.. perhaps I may be able to understand and forgive her.
For the mean time or for as long as I’m with her, in order to minimize future attempts to work on for her HABIT, I had to lock everything that was unlocked before, even TRUST!
akalain mo mah partner..
ReplyDeletemy blogspot kna?
tlgang nkikinig kna skin ah... hahahaha